Two Lines Means...

Positive!! I'm 6-week pregnant! Yey! I'm don't really know how to describe it but to say that I'm happy is such an understatement! Weeee!!! Hahaha!!

It took us 2 months to conceive and we're so happy that God blessed us this early! I took the pregnancy test since I've been delayed for 2 weeks already. I wanted to do the self test after I missed my period the first week but I was afraid I'll be disappointed again if I don't see a positive result. I didn't know it was heartbreaking when you're expecting that you're pregnant only to have your period the next day. So I told myself that I'll wait for a couple of weeks before taking the test.

Before the test, I've been experiencing a lot of the pregnancy signs already but like what I've said I don't want to think of it too much. But my friends, officemates, and husband all felt it could be different this time. So I took the test and alleluia! Two lines!

Then I've started reading about false positive pregnancy results since the second line wasn't as clear as the first one. Talk about Paranoia, I began to worry and doubt if there's really a life inside me. That's even with the assurance of our doctor that I'm really pregnant.

And then I had the ultrasound I've been waiting for... I saw and heard my baby's heartbeat for the first time... I was relieved. All of a sudden, all those worries and fears were immediately replaced by feelings of excitement and a feeling of hope - a new beginning of some sort. I'm going to be a mother!! =D

Walking Around Singapore

I mean this literally. My Gawd! Even with the most comfortable flip flops and shoes, my feet (and body) hurts from walking around Singapore for four days. I think I badly need a massage and a foot spa!

Anyway, back to my story. My friend and I, together with my mother, went to Singapore for a vacation and to visit two of our close friends. We were able to save a lot since our accommodation was free (courtesy of our friend of course). Our itinerary includes the Orchard Road, Esplanade, Clark Quay, Sentosa, Universal Studios, Marina Bay Sands, Singapore zoo, and Jurong Bird Park. But we decided to scratch out our planned visit to the zoo and the bird park because I don't think we can handle another day of walking.

Everyone loves a good discount. And so are we! We were thankful that our friend works at Resorts World which is inside Sentosa so we were able to get discounted tickets to Universal Studio and use that same benefit for our shopping needs inside that place.

I like Singapore. I can walk around the street at midnight without worrying that somebody would stab me and take away my money. I also like the idea of their EZ card; commuting around the city is so convenient. And what about shopping? I like the fact that a tourist can get a refund for the items they bought. I wonder, is there something like this in the Philippines? If not, I think we should. To encourage tourists to spend more in our country.

What I'm not fond of is their language - Singlish. I can't really say I hate it because that's one of the things which makes that country unique. You can say I was amused and confused while talking to Singaporeans.

What I regret though, is that I decided to have this vacation without my husband. I thought I wanted to spend traveling with my friends but I kept on thinking about him the whole time - how he would have enjoyed the food, the scenes, the rides etc. That's why when we got back home, I gave him a promise that I won't be traveling without him anymore.

Hmm... I'll definitely go back to Singapore.

Blogging.. Blog.. Blah.

Just a quick post about blogging in general. Obviously, I love blogging. I want to share myself, my opinion, my experience to the cyberworld through my own little online space. I'm not a very good writer but I know I can express myself more through writing than talking. Anyway, my day will not be complete without blog hopping. I don't frequently leave comments but I read most entries on the blogs I follow (and sometimes even those that I don't follow).

It just annoys me how some people create blog but can't find time to maintain it. It's like adopting a pet. At first, you give all your attention to it but once your pet grows, you start to neglect it. Hello, ningas cogon!

Ever since I've started this blog in 2007, I'm proud to say that I was able to create a blog entry at least once a month. I don't post daily on my blog because I know I can't maintain and keep it like that. Excuse me for ranting, just letting people know of one of my pet peeves.

Shoes For My Blues

For a person like me who takes too long to decide what to wear, I sometimes prepare the clothes for work the next morning. I'm not really a hardcore fashionista who always dress to impress but I make sure my shoes would complement my outfit. Hence, the reason for my habit.

Here's a portion of that habit:

My name is Ayen, and I'm a shoe-holic. =D

Some people call it a waste of money and unnecessary, for me it's a necessity. I have a shoe fetish and I really can't stand to see nice clothes with the wrong kind of shoes. I could understand some people might frown this shoe splurging but hey I'm spending, not them. It's also better than smoking cigarettes! And it doesn't kill.

Luckily, my husband accepted this habit eversince we started dating. Admit it, we all feel insecure sometimes and one of the many reasons I love about my husband is that he knows a new pair of shoes makes me feel good about myself. Knowing that I'm wearing a great pair makes me feel sexy, confident and fashionable.

It doesn't mean though that he doesn't complain. Because he does! Specially everytime I whine about not having many shoes. And that's how I feel - not having enough shoes for every occasion. I use to buy at least two pairs of shoes a month when I was single. Of course I now have to prioritize my "needs and wants" since I'm married.

Sorry for my shallowness. One of you must be rolling your eyes now. Yes, I do know that some people in Africa doesn't even have one pair. Arrg! I'm being too defensive. I guess it's just one of those days when I really can't find a nice pair to wear. I'm know I have a shoe habit but I'm happy to say that it's something I can handle.

The Next BIG Step

It's already nine months since we got married. For some couples, planning a family is the immediate next step. But for us, we decided to wait for a year - to give us time to enjoy our marriage by ourselves.

People we know keep asking us when we'll have a baby or why they don't notice any baby bump in my stomach. We casually answer them that we're not ready yet. They thought that we are in our early to mid twenties so it was alright anyway, that we should take our time. But eveytime I tell them that I just turned thirty, I would get the same horrified reaction - I shouldn't postpone pregnancy at my age.

At first it was okay, I just shrug it off but as time goes by it becomes annoying and somewhat disturbing. What do they care anyway? It's our life. And what if we'll have problems conceiving a child? What if we'll be one of those couples who took 5 years or more to get pregnant. So I begin to rethink our decision and asked my husband again how he feels about starting a family.

They say communication is really an important factor to a successful marriage. The funny thing is, we've both been having second thoughts about planning a family until next year. So after a sincere conversation, we've decided that we should try and get pregnant a month or two from now. So I'll better stop taking pills and start preparing my body. Yikes! But I guess excited at the same time. So excited that we already decided on a name for our future baby. Hahaha! I guess it's only normal.

Planning a family is not something like planning a vacation. Not only the physical, but I know I have to keep myself emotionally prepared... This is really a big step for me, for us. I'm scared, excited, and anxious at the same time...

*picture taken from http://www.digitaljournal.com/image/46049