Less than a year before our wedding and I'm having doubts... again... Is this what I really want? It's not the person I'll marry but the life after the wedding. I don't know if I'll ever be ready. Nico told me to go on a vacation, alone if I want to, just to try and find myself and do some soul searching. I really feel bad for him. This is the second time I told him about my fears. I appreciate his patience. Hay... I don't want to see him breaking down again.