Monday, August 8, 2011

I Dream A Dream

An officemate once asked me, "Ano ba pangarap mo sa buhay?" Without battling an eyelid, I answered her "Just three things: to get married, to have a child of my own, and to live comfortably." It's that simple.

When I was a kid, I'd always dream of becoming a prima ballerina. During grade school and high school, I wanted to be a journalist. In college, I took up Psychology and wanted to be an HR Manager. I even took up graduate studies in Psychology to help me achieve this goal. Well, I had ballet lessons, I became a literary editor in our school paper, and I became an HR Personnel. I am that determined and persistent. If I want something, I'll make sure I'll get it. However, dreams do change.

Before I got married, I've realized that I don't want a career in the industry. There had been plenty of opportunities for a possible promotion, a career growth, but I declined, that's not what I want and it won't make me happy. If I'm in a management level, would I have time for my husband? Would it be easy for us to make a family? Heck, I don't want to risk any of it. That's why I'm perfectly happy working even as a rank and file employee. I work, go home on time, and get paid. I don't really want a big responsibility at work and I prefer a bigger responsibility at home - that is, becoming a wife and a mother.

When I gave birth to Quino, I finally became a mother. It's what I've always wanted. I don't think I can even put into words, the happiness I've felt upon the realization that I have everything I ever wanted - a loving husband and son. Sometimes it's tiring, they would also drive me crazy with both their demands but I like taking care of my two boys. My fulfillment in life - the essence of my womanhood.

My 60-day maternity leave is over and I'll be going back to work. I really want to quit my job and just take care of my baby boy but I also want to help my husband with the expenses, specially now that we'll be moving soon to our own place. So for now, I'll just have to wait for a while. One day, I'll be a Stay-at-Home-Mom who'll take care of my husband and kids fulltime, but not this time.


Apple said...

awww.. naiyak ako sa post mo sis.. :(

Ayen said...

really? madrama ba? i didn't mean for it to be like that.

The Average Jane said...

I agree. Dreams do change when we least expect it. =)

Nuna said...

May God give you the desires of your heart. :) God bless you family.

anney said...

Just follow you heart and you'll never go wrong. Have a blessed week!

Jhan said...

ako rin!!! I want to be a SAHM but I can't. I'll be going back for work on Sept. 5 and I am getting separation anxiety already. huhuhu.